#1 Resolution… Not to be Grumpy
As trite as it may be to do a Year End / Looking Ahead column at this point in time, “trite” is not necessarily bad. “Doing a jigsaw puzzle” during the Christmas / New Year’s Holidays is also “trite” and we did that earlier this week. So it’s not like I have a trite-free reputation to protect.
Be it resolved… my two “Resolutions” for 2018 are, in order…
(1) I will not be “Grumpy”… America is in “turmoil” these days. DUH! There is vicious, and usually profane, disagreement over “Why”. Every indication is that we ain’t seen nuthin’ yet as far as socio-cultural-political strife and discord. I can’t do much about all that. I wish I could, but I can’t. I cannot ignore it either, and I won’t. I can control how I discuss it here. I resolve “not to be grumpy” about it.
I prefer my columns like I prefer my eggs… sunny side up. If there is not “a sunny side” there is always a ridiculous side…
FYI… disagreeing with your misguided POV on any subject is NOT my definition of “Grumpy”. My perspective of the socio-cultural-political discord has not changed.
This has always been intended to be an ENTERTAINING website to visit. If you smile or spew coffee over your keyboard that’s great. If you inadvertently learn something or get a different perspective on an issue that is great too. My being ill-tempered does not contribute to any of those objectives.
I am not promising not to make YOU grumpy. You are in charge of your emotions. “Hot stoves” and “wet paint” will never be avoided.
After 20 years of doing this over 2000 times I have yet, to my knowledge, changed the course of even one mighty river; or noticeably affected the rise or fall of even one itty bitty civilization. That’s not to say I can’t or won’t but The Past is our best predictor of The Future.
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(2) I will be “briefer”… as Publisher / Editor / and In-House Legend I can say whatever I want to here and take as many words to say it as I wish. That hasn’t changed, but going forward I want to say it in no more than 750-800 words. Most “incredibly insightful commentaries” here have run 850-1000 words or more.
Like the proverbial “lady’s skirt” – these commentaries should be (1) long enough to cover the subject’ (2) short enough to be interesting.
That means a sharper editing pencil and maybe an extra ten minutes arguing with myself over which awesomely clever paragraphs are the most awesomely clever and which are not quite awesome enough.
If a particular subject simply can’t be adequately covered in 750-800 words, it will be continued in a future column.
FWIW… the tendency with many websites of this genre is towards longer columns of 1000-1500 words. I’ve never been one to follow the herd.
After these 20 years / 2000+ commentaries, I hope I have learned who my audience is… and who it is not.
If you were born in the 40-50-early 60s you hopefully “get” most of my oblique references, metaphors and similes. With my resolve to be “briefier” I can’t provide lengthy footnotes.
Allowing for generational attrition (sigh!) attracting everyone on the planet in the above demographic will be sufficient for me.
If The William Tell Overture does not make you think of The Lone Ranger you probably are not among a kindred assemblage here.
Perhaps you should seek out websites where the headline – Kendrick Lamar (???) to perform at half-time of College National Championship Game” – means something to you. If you actually use the phrases “drop the mic” or “gave shade” or assorted other millennial-speak, you are welcome here… but at your risk, not mine.
I am indeed walking down Life’s 17th Fairway. But I AM spry enough to walk without a cane and to carry my own bag. 
When those of My Generation depart this mortal coil, no one says “but he/she was so young”. OUCH. I’ve never been this old before. Don’t laugh… neither have you.
I will enthusiastically discuss Issues of The Day as I process them within the context of my personal Life Experiences.
Oh… I read somewhere that this is the final week of The NFL regular season. By golly I made it through seventeen weeks without watching even part of one game or being tempted to do so. Making it thru The Super Bowl will be a piece of cake. My personal decision had naught to do with “patriotism” or “kneeling”. I simply am no longer interested.
“Why” I am no longer interested in The NFL might make a nice 750-word column… so long as I can be brief avoid “being grumpy”.
PS: As of “right now” – Friday 10:45 AM – “the twins” – Ruthie & Scout – have NOT arrived in far-away (and frozen) Madison; but that could change any minute. Mother & babies all doing just fine. No one is worried… but all are anxious.
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