Color & Pageantry 2012
....... Aug 28, '12:
OK, its time to file away all those annual stories about NCAA reforms and the hypocrisy of Big Time College Football. All that bluster about “its time to DO something”. Cease the tongue clucking about coaches job-hopping..... and illiterate 18 y/os choosing Whattsamatta U ‘cause “they have a great bio-physics lab”.
...... Time to get out the portable grills and picnic coolers and foam fingers et al. Strike up the band for Color & Pageantry 2012...... Boola boola. Roll Tide!
I really do enjoy spectatorizing College Football. Whether it’s from my Home Theater (aka Living Room) or in selected stadia with carefully selected acquainti, watching the game of college football is a most enjoyable thing to do. The season for doing just that is upon us.
I enjoy the NFL too as a sports event but I enjoy the collegiate version much more. There is just so much more of all that darn Color & Pageantry piled on top of “the game”.
Regular readers know that I approach a football game pretty much like I approach going to a movie.... or sitting down to watch an anticipated TV show – in either case I am doing so to be entertained for several hours.
I am NOT (1) looking for a testosterone boost and certainly NOT (2) a vicarious reaffirmation of my worth as a human being.
I appreciate that some, perhaps more than “some”, do indeed seek these other objectives from watching a football game. I appreciate that “some” like Indian food with lots of curry. I don’t.
I am looking forward to a most enjoyable Fall. I hope each of you enjoys the upcoming season as much as I plan to.... however you define “enjoy”.
• “Officials” (aka the refs) will be worse than ever and OBVIOUSLY in the tank for “the other team”.... because they always are. Each conference will have THE WORSE officials in the country bar none.
• Ugly uniforms will get uglier. Apparently some fan faction really likes really ugly non-traditional uniforms. I’ve never met anyone in those factions. I don’t need to.
• The ESPN Gameday crew will be much maligned simply because. The “I Hate Herbie” crowd will continue to “hate Herbie”. That’s another faction I’ve never signed up for. He seems like a good guy to me.
• There will be a token “eye candy” on ESPN Gameday replacing Erin Andrews. Whatever.....
• Crowd shots at every stadium will show 5-6 college kids screaming and waving their #1 finger even if their team is obviously not #1 and never will be. That’s OK.
• There will be college games pretty much 7/days/week because some schlub conference has sold its soul just to be on TV even if it’s Tuesday night. I don’t watch any game when I don’t know the nickname of either team.
• It will be odd to have Penn State out-of-the-picture. I hope we don’t have to rehash that mess every week but I bet we will.
• The SEC WILL continue to dominate because the SEC has the best athletes and best program traditions. SEC-haters will whine and complain but that won’t change reality.
• I hope Texas and Mack Brown wins it’s “big games” this year. I like Mack even though many many years ago “he lied to ‘dem boys”.
• I don’t like Lane Kiffin and, by connection, I don’t like USC but I really don’t like Oregon either. I think Oregon is THE #1 Outlaw school in America now. I hope Mike Leach at Washington State whups both USC and Oregon. He probably won’t but I hope he does.
• I’ve never cared for Michigan but their coach seems like a decent fellow. I do like Michigan’s fight song.
• I appreciate that Nick Saban personifies the Big Time Big Money Mega Program Coach; but I like him. Notice you never hear about “bad boyz” at Alabama. Nick probably bought the Tuscaloosa Police Dept but still, we don’t hear about problems there.
• Georgia will have more bad boyz because Georgia always has more bad boyz than anyone else. I don’t know why.
• I’m still not happy with Mizzou bolting the Big 12 for the SEC. I hope they do OK, but I’m not expecting too much.
• Notre Dame will continue to be THE most over-rated over-hyped team in America. I don’t like that coach named Kelly either.
• I still don’t care for green uniforms. I like uniform colors that contrast with the field. I REALLY don’t like Boise ‘s blue-on-blue.
• Those inane coach mini-interviews at the begin/end of the half will continue to be inane.
• There will be three BIG upsets in the first two weeks. I don’t know who but there will be.
• I really do hope that Wuffs can be happy with TO’B and enjoy their team’s success but I’m sure a faction of’em will always have one eye glued towards Chapel Hill.
• Does anyone care about GaTech or Boston College or Maryland AT ALL?
• Frank Beamer will win 10 games..... and water is wet.
• I don’t think FlaSt will be as good as they are suppose to be.
• I always pull for Wake Forest & Jim Grobe to make their fine fans proud; whatever that means.
• I think it would be wonderful if Duke gets a Bowl game. I like Dave Cutcliffe.
Have you downloaded that WCHL app so you can listen to Art & me two hours before the Kenan kick-off? Remember we are on WCHL 1360AM / 97.9 FM.... NOT the Tar Heel Sports Network. We really are going to be quite provocative!
I really really like deviled eggs..... and pimento cheese..... and country ham biscuits..... and fly-overs..... and flipping cheerleaders..... and fans removing their hats for the National Anthem..... and 70 degree game time temperature..... and lots of scoring..... and Big Plays..... and John Philip Souza marches by the bands..... and sober fans..... and little kids thrilled to be at The Game with their Moms and Dads
I hope you do too.
oh.... I wish every school's band had a high-steppin' drum major..... and majorettes with FIRE BATONS. I miss FIRE BATONS, don't you?