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'Tis The Season for _____ .

BobLeeSays: Dec 13, ’12

It’s December boys & girls and you know what THAT means! It’s “Suspend a bunch of bad boys Month” in BCS World. ..... What socio-cultural “problem” will the NFL adopt as it’s very own next week? ..... and BobLee discusses the Whose Ox Rule for websites .......

Being a bowl team means......
...... Pretty much every major college in North America EXCEPT UNC, tOSU, Penn State, and Madge’s College of Hair Removal is preparing for its “Big Bowl Game” these days. This means its “uh oh” time for 2.5 bad boyz on each team.
    2.5 is the average number of miscreants suspended from each bowl team during December.   Some teams suspend more, some suspend less. SEC teams average 6.8/team which skews the overall stats. The NCAA mandates a minimum of one human sacrifice per bowl team. Most schools choose an anonymous “biscuit boy” from its meat squad. 3rd string deep-snappers are popular choices. Others select from their ample supply of druggies, bullies, pervs, and sexual predators.   At UNC this is known as the K Mays Rule.
   The most popular reason for these annual December suspensions is “violation of unspecified team rules”. This is the football team equivalent of “irreconcilable differences”. It covers a multitude of sins.   Most BCS schools do, thankfully, have “team rules” governing “beating up coeds”.... “brandishing a 9mm in a convenience store”.... “stealing cars”.... and all that yucky kilos and gram drug stuff. Who knew?
     Why do these incidents happen in December? They don’t. They happen during the regular season but since those games actually “matter” most schools put their “deal with its” on hold until December so the team can qualify for one of the 128 bowl games and their coach can collect his bowl game bonus.
     An oft-asked question is “do suspended thug-aletes get bowl-bling”? Yes they do. Teams put a cache of extra bowl bling in a shopping bag in an un-locked car in a pre-determined dorm parking lot. Within 24 hours the cache of bling (and occasionally the car itself) is gone.
    Our holiday wish for you is that your team doesn’t lose “a player that matters” in this December's Suspension Derby.

The NFL Problem de Week.....
...... Two weeks ago the NFL had “a gun problem”. This week the NFL has “a drunk driving problem”. Who wants to guess what rampant socio-cultural disorder “the league” will adopt as it’s very own next week?   If Jason Whitlock and Bob Costas know, they aren’t telling anyone.
    In October the NFL “pinked out” to show it’s support for abolishing breast cancer. Somebody made some serious $$$$ supplying the pink shoes, pink gloves, pink caps et al and hopefully Susan B. Komen got a nickel when the accounting was done, but don’t bet on it. I had always wondered if the NFL was in favor of breast cancer or not. Good to know it is not.
    Now what about Diabetes, Alzheimer’s, Leukemia..... ? If those afflictions can decide on “a color” perhaps the NFL will support them too.
    My sources tell me the next NFL Problem will be “Texting while driving a Bentley”. The runner-up next league-wide problem was “Not tipping enough at strip clubs”.
   The League would like to find a problem that involves a Manning or a Tebow. Alas, “not flossing after every meal” doesn’t have much marketing pizzazz.

   Related News: The NFL Rules Committee is seriously considering doing away with 2nd Downs and "brunette cheerleaders".

Whose Ox the media gores.....
..... A week or so ago we discussed “a website reports.....” as sufficient reason for distressed tabloid media to break-out its Second Coming type to ignite a stoopid firestorm among a lunatic fringe.   “Fedora Hates UNC – Bolting For Knoxville” was the bogus story used as case-in-point by the N&O. WuffNation’s lunatics were the ignited fringe.
    As a secondary example we used “a website report” on SI.com (SI = Sports Illustrated) that noted Frau Yow’s prominent role in bankrupting Maryland’s Ath Dept.
    BobLee has no clue whatsoever of Ms Yow’s financial acumen. I am assuming it is exemplary. I would personally support Ms Yow to replace Tiny Tim Geithner as Secretary of Treasury in a heartbeat. Heck, I would support Hawkeye Whitney to replace Geithner. I was simply noting what “a website was reporting”.
    When is “a website report” valid and when is it bogus? Well, thanks to a dyed-in-the-red-wool ardent admirer of Ms Yow, we now have that answer.

A “website report” IS valid when:
(1) it is favorable to an individual or institution you like.... OR when
(2) it is UNfavorable to an individual or institution you don’t like.

    That Yow-lovin’ fellow supplied us “another website report” that was less critical of Ms Yow’s role at Maryland and instructed us to “believe this one not that other one”.   OoooKay!
    It should be noted that that same guy is a really really really devoted fan of Dan Kane and he is certain every word Dan writes on the N&O website indicting UNC is 100% Gospel Truth. SURPRISE SURPRISE!

    My e-mail box is "like Gump's box o' chocolates". I never know what I'm gonna find when I open one. Any one who doesn’t think I giggled a really really long time over the above exchange really doesn’t know me very well at all. In fact I’m still giggling..... giggle, giggle, giggle.

++++

Posted: December 13, 2012 at 7:15 AM by SaidWHATMedia | with 10 comments | Tagged as: bowlgames, NFL

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Comments

	Ben in MO
	If you think the ratios for $$$ are out of whack for prostate cancer research and breast cancer research, take a look at the $$$ spent on Aids research compared to numbers afflicted...and Aids is preventable. _______ BL: "Squeaky wheels" get the media coverage. .
	12/13/2012 4:02:31 PM

	fayettewuf
	Hyperbole is the stock and trade of anyone writing for the entertainment the public unless they are named Dan Kane (who we NC State alums believe is divinely inspired). But to belabor a point (I hate to belabor points), no one claimed that Fedora was leaving UNC for UT on any site that I visit. It was reported that he interviewed with UT. If you define interview as put on a coat and tie and talk with whoever is making the decision about hiring it is one thing. If you define having a Coca Cola with salted peanuts in it with someone working with the person doing the hiring about how much money you would be making if you did put on a coat and tie and talk to said person as an interview, it is another. That is getting back to gored oxen. It is not just the internet, it is rumors in general. Folks are much more apt to believe that someone else's preacher is having long out of town conferences with the choir director than about their preacher. ___________ BL: No, he never "interviewed" w/ UTenn. His agent WAS approached by UTenn and like a real estate agent receiving an offer, his agent was duty bound to tell him of the offer. Which Fedora promptly turned down with no curiosity for further discussion. The N&O story was headlined and written to imply far greater interaction than ever took place. Which created unnecessary glee and anxiety respectively among two rival fan bases - as was the tabloid reporter's intent. As to the SI report re: Frau, I understand the SI writer is "a close friend of (TAAA DAAA) the eeeevil Gary Williams". A possibility that I cannot speak to. So both fan bases were apparently "jobbed" by "website reports". :-) I'm not a Dan Kane-hater. He did not create the mess at all, simply uncovered it. The issue of repetitive stories rehashing old reports bothers some UNCers, but I reserve my ire for Dickie The Putz who coulda/shoulda "nipped it all in the bud" years ago. .
	12/13/2012 1:36:47 PM

	NCSU68Grad
	Could not let your NFL and Pink $$ go without mentioning the "commercialism" of PINK. 5 Hour Energy's PINK campaign donates a NICKEL (5 cents) up to $75,000. That would be 1,500,000 BOTTLES. That is a lot of sugar and caffine. The online price for a case (12) is around $2.50 per BOTTLE....don't know or care how much the sell for in the stores as an individaul...BUT do the math. They are donating 2% of the gross, but will obviously make it up in volume. I would also bet that some crafty tax accountant is trying to figure out some way of double dipping on the advertising so that they can count it twice.... I guess that I am just getting a bit cynical....reading too much about Bev and her Legacy Salvation Tour tends to do that. _______ BL: I will let AgentPierce speak for me as regards Guvy Dumplin' shenanigans. AGAIN.... (anticpating an attack by the Susan B. Komen bunch) I am strongly opposed to all forms of cancer regardless of it's assigned color. .
	12/13/2012 10:34:13 AM

	NCSU68Grad
	BL, I realize that usually I use Humor (sarcastically...NAH!) sometimes to make a point. However, your PINKING OUT really struck a nerve. I am ALL for saving the TaTa's....BUT, as a Prostate Cancer Survior, I had done a little bit of reading. Here is an article that was published in 2010. It also jibes with several other studies that I have seen. Fifty times more money is spent on research for breast cancer than is spent on prostate cancer. Does that mean there are 50 times more women dying from breast cancer than men dying from prostate cancer? Hardly. Every year 40,000 women die of breast cancer and 34,000 men die of prostate cancer. And yearly, there are only 15,000 more new cases of breast cancer than prostate cancer. Since mortality rates and occurrence figures are similar, what could explain why a woman with breast cancer is thought to be 50 times more important than I am? The answer may be related less to science than it is to male vanity. (end Quote) I really wish that we would have a "Save the DingDong's" event. Now, I will leave it to the rest of the readers, probably MALE to draw their own conclusions....But, PINK is great....but we need a color for PC. Your reference to Hawkeye brings a mixed emotion. All of us feel bad when one of our guys makes the wrong choices. Hawkeye did pay his debt to society, with some help from his old coach and some NCSU players. He then started working at a school in St. Louis to help other youth from making the mistakes he did. Don't know how that turned out....but I would probably believe what he told me more that Timmy (TurboTax) Geithner.... ___________ BL: Breast Cancer is certainly no laughing matter at all, nor are the various other cancers and serious heath issues in our society. ... The NFL is notoriously "politically correct" however and quick to knee-jerk when a PC-ish cause shows up on its doorstep. Info I have read reports that "pink month in the NFL" did NOT reap Big Bucks for Breast Cancer Research - but maybe I read the "wrong website report" . :-) I'm sure Hawkeye is a fine fellow as are assorted UNC athletes who have gotten crossways in their lives. The "ours" vs "theirs" Rule again! .
	12/13/2012 10:03:32 AM

	nctravellinman
	BL, regarding the "2.5" rule, college programs need to take a page from the Nascar rule book. Nascar has a rule book, but they only need the one rule they always use to suspend and/or fine people and teams. It is section 12.4 "actions detrimental to racin' ", which says "we can do anything we want". See BL, we're starting to fix the college football system right here on your little website :) BTW, NFL doesn't have a gun problem. They've got an "illiterate millionaires on too many drugs & women" problem. _________ BL: Public opinion on "NFL Social Issues" seems to be widely divergent. :-) .
	12/13/2012 10:02:08 AM

	JackInJacksonville
	I don't suppose you would ID that Yow-loving' fellow would you? ___________ BL: You "don't suppose" correctly. If he chooses to out himself thats up to him. .
	12/13/2012 8:51:41 AM

	Madge
	BobLee, thanks for the plug for my Hair Removal College. My website is en fuego as a result. Actually we DID play in the BeefO'BradyPotatoFamine Bowl in Indiana, Pennsylvania in 2009. Or was it in Pennsylvania, Indiana. I get those confused. We lost - but the refs cheated. _________ BL: "a plug" for a Hair Removal College? There is a Freudian joke in there somewhere. What sort of bling did you get from the BO'BPotatorFamine Bowl? The mind reels.... .
	12/13/2012 8:46:00 AM

	Martha
	You always warn us about "spewing coffee on keyboards". I thought you were kidding. "Not flossing after every meal" did it for me. You ARE a menace to keyboards. ______ BL: Go to BestBuy and tell'em you are a BLBuddy. You get a 10% discount on a new keyboard IF you bring in the coffee-spewed one. .
	12/13/2012 8:34:06 AM

	ACCharlie
	Why "The K Mays Rule"? ___________ During The Torbush Era, one pre-bowl December K Mays and 5-6 teammates kicked the crap out of a geek outside of a Chapel Hill night club. Fortunately (??) for UNC fans one of the 6-7 mugging gridders was a "meat squad guy". After several days of hush-hush deliberations, the meat squad kid took the rap so the "good players" could play in the bowl game. Forensic evidence (and eyewitnesses) determined it was impossible that he could have done the damage alone but what-the-heck it "was a Bowl Game" so wink-wink. .... such "lets blame meat-squad Mikie" stuff happens A LOT in BCS World in December. .
	12/13/2012 8:27:35 AM

	MackForThePack
	A "Hawkeye Whitney" reference !!!! The world needs more Hawkeye Whitney references. Thanks. ___________ BL: Darn tootin'. "Dirty Dan" Wells and Serge Zwicker are great ones too. :-) .
	12/13/2012 7:20:46 AM