Those Chinese... AND Hickory Rotarians



Those Chinese.... AND Hickory Rotarians

..... Sept 24, ’12: 
Last week I traveled to Hickory to speak to the Hickory Rotary Club.  What I learned was exactly what I told Holden Thorp four years ago.... and have reminded you guys on numerous occasions.  Those good ol’ 8,000,000, 000 Chinese ain’t alone......  and a recap of Week Four on America’s gridirons......

It was a boffo joke that Art and I had used in Week One of our Good Sports radio show......

Which of the following would you most want to meet in person?
1.    Jennifer Aniston
2.    Jennifer Garner
3.    Jennifer Lopez
4.    Jennifer Wiley

Remember that our show is based in Chapel Hill so the bulk of its audience are “those people” !!  So Barry The WCHL GM received the indignant “how dare you!” admonishment that our insensitive remark was sexist – chauvinistic – demeaning to wimmen and 4-5 other shrill harrumphs from the terminal harrumphers that prowl that unique environment..... confirming, of course, that it was a GREAT line.   Take THAT harrumphers.

There were no such harrumphers in Hickory last Thursday.  At least not among the 100 or so “city fathers” (and a few “city mothers”) at Lake Hickory Country Club to hear “some guy that Bruce found”.   Bruce being Bruce Bumbarger my host Rotarian who had booked me six weeks earlier.

In the hierarchy of civic clubs Rotary tends to attract the afore-mentioned “city father / mother” demographic.... doctors, lawyers, Indian chiefs.  The butchers, bakers and candlestick makers usually opt to be Kiwanians or Optimists or Jaycees.  I’ve appeared before’em all over the years but always choose “a shirt with a collar” for my Rotary gigs.  

NOTE:  per Bruce; the school partisan ratio of Hickory Rotary is pretty much what one might find in Wilmington, Rocky Mount, Salisbury or Fayetteville except likely more Lenoir-Rhyne fans since the LR campus was about two miles from where we were sitting.

For those who can’t keep their weekly UNC headlines straight, last week was “Holden Resigns & Stays Resigned”.  Not to be confused with the week before’s “Matt & Tami Did WHAT?”  No telling what this week will be.... stay tuned.  But “a headline” is a static non-evasive thing.  If you don’t see it, then you don’t see it.   Aka that “tree falling in the deep woods and no one hears it.........” query.

So back to “the four Jennifers”..... I did the set-up listing the four Jennifers and..... and..... and.  Crickets.   Of the 100+ in attendance MAYBE 15-20 recognized the name Jennifer Wiley.  To be fair, likely far fewer knew Ben Affleck’s wife – Jennifer Garner (or even Ben Affleck) but that is irrelevant to my incredible point.

Recall my admonition to Holden’s concern of “why does EVERYONE care so much about what happens at UNC....?”   Which was “EVERYONE does NOT care all that much”.   At least by the time one is 50-100-150 miles away from Ground Zero.

Who knew but out yonder in the hinterlands those folks are not enthralled by the latest Dan Kane revelation or regurgitation.  They knew about Holden’s resignation and the general tsunamic scandal but were not into the minutiae that generates the taunts and titters amonst the CliffClavins at water coolers within that Ground Zero biosphere.  It can be assumed therefore that the fine folks of Catawba County HAVE A LIFE!   God bless’em.

I asked Bruce My Host if Hickory-ites read either of the state’s McClatchy-owned fishwraps – The N&O or the Charlotte Observer.  “Not if we can help it” was Bruce’s quick reply.  Confirming that Hickory is right in-line with the popular trend from Murphy To Manteo.  

The Four Jennifers notwithstanding, my overall remarks were very well-received and a very fine time was had by all......  SA-LUTE to Hickory Rotary!

>><<

Week Four...... In the battle of the coaches ending in “o” – Jimbo whupped Dabo pretty convincingly but not as convincingly as West Virginia did in the Orange Bowl.  Ouch.   A “Bring Back Danny Ford” sign quickly appeared outside The Esso Club.

The ACC appears to have returned to Florida State and the eleven “we stress basketball and academics” dwarfs.

Four out of five of NC’s “major colleges” won with #5 (ECU) falling to one of the other four - UNC.  Wuffs and Deacs beat up on military schools while Duke beat Memphis which apparently everyone does; but Duke takes a W any time it can get one.  Bryn Renner once again “had a better week than Matt Kupec”.

Missouri notched its second convincing defeat as an SEC member prompting the query “when do we get to play Kentucky or Ol’ Miss?”

The Bob Stoops Radio Show in Norman will probably NOT take callers this week.

Mike London’s campaign in Hoo-ville to cause Mr Jefferson to forget Al Groh is not gaining much traction.   Likewise Edsall-mania in College Park has flatlined.

Future ACC step-member Notre Dame became the first ACC step-member to beat schools from Michigan in back-to-back weeks.  For the third year in a row, The Denard Robinson For Heisman campaign office shut down before October 1.

>><<

BobLee’s Huddle Up column on chapelboro.com this week trumpets A Signature Event in UNC Football History that occurred amid Kenan’s lofty pines on Saturday past.

“....... who’s the guy in the blue-white striped tie?” they all asked. ...... a first class gesture by a first-class guy.  CLICK.

>><<
Posted: September 24, 2012 at 10:14 AM by SaidWHATMedia | with 12 comments
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Comments
The Cowdog
There ya go BL, we've another thing in common.
I too, have been a guest speaker for a Rotarian luncheon.

Guess they wanted the hometown boy to regal of first year experiences of Bowl games and NCAA baseball playoffs.

Geez, if I'd only known. They got pleas for funding Sickle Cell research and as a side car, a little talk about acid rain, and its affect on the Adirondack White Ash. Ya know, White Ash, the life's breath of Louisville Slugger?

I got a warm departing handshake or two after.

One of them from my old man, the other ol' coach. As he shakes my hand he says,

" Ah, nice job kid. Ya really knocked 'em dead. "

Odd that they never asked me back.

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BL: I've done 100+ of these over the years. About every 8-9 I let slip one of George Carlin's seven words just to see who's paying attention. :-)
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9/27/2012 8:06:57 PM

58 Wolf Kennel
BL, almost missed this article. We had a great 55th Reunion of our 1957 ACC Championship Football Team this past weekend. Had 31 back with 17 having passed. Good people from that era. Coach Earle Edwards first recruiting class in 1954 had 1/3 of us from North Carolina; 1/3 from Eastern Pa; and 1/3 from Western Pa. My best friend ***** came from Downingtown, and we all learned some diversity. Jim Oddo, our center, is still coaching well at Charlotte Catholic after 53 years. Speaker at Saturday luncheon was from the 1979 ACC Football Champs. Need to get some new ones. Loved your comments and inferences about Rotary and other clubs. Continuing from my Rotary International Fellowship days, I've enjoyed probably 75 Rotary presentations. Food always typical, people always good, and my standard joke in each speech used to be "Always good to speak to Rotary because it gives me courage to grow older". Now I are one.

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BL: R O T A R Y .... that spells Rotary. The Hickory folks still "SING" which I love. Not all clubs still do.
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9/26/2012 9:53:16 AM

OneOfThosePeople
Thanks for the little primer on the various civic clubs in the state. I always wondered about that. It seemed like my dad would try a new one every year when I was growing up. I remember thinking that Kiwanis was the fancy one in our town.
I miss those civic club signs that used to be posted at the entrances to the town. "Whoa! Look at how many clubs Monroe has!"

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BL: Like everything else in our society - civic clubs are competitive. They are ALL fine organizations that benefit their communities in many ways. Some stress active participation in projects... others "just" write checks.

The club demographics in a community will vary. A lot depends on aggressive leadership over time. They are great for personal & professional networking.

I have been members of 6-7 in my travels of different labels.
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9/25/2012 11:03:13 AM

They shoulda kept Boyd at QB
BobLee:
I just read your "Band Of Brothers' blog at chapelboro.com.....Kudos !!!
If you've been there as a walk-on, the average fan can't imagine the futile pride one feels at rising to 5th team because you know you worked your way past two other guys......One more spot and you get to dress and two more spots and you get to travel !!!.................The strength it takes to endure a couple of mad scientist coaches design plays that seem to center around "Let's see what happens when we have these two HUGE 1st teamers double team this under-sized Scout Team guy". It typically illicited a "That was cool. Let's run it again !" response from the coaches.........The experience wrecked my GPA, added a year to my graduation, and left me with scars and arthritis in both shoulders......Today, I WOULDN'T TRADE IT FOR A MILLION DOLLARS !!!...It simply made me a better man....Life always knocks you down, and it taught me how to pick myself up quickly......P.S. - I graduated from your "sister" institution, but I knew Boyd from high school..I just wanted to get a UNC point of reference...Boyd was ahead of his time...A Tim Tebow bull-dozing QB before there was a Tim Tebow :)....High School QB to College Offensive Tackle is a road less traveled.,,,One last thng, if you've ever been "on the inside", you don't feel the animosity towards your rival program that seems to infect most of the fansbase.....Looping back to "Band Of Brothers", ever notice the respect that one soldier shares with an opposing soldier?....Please don't feel compelled to post my comments....I just wanted to let you know that you were "spot-on" with your article, and I enjoy reading your words.

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BL: Glad to post your comments. The walk-ons, scout squad, anyone below 2nd team knows of what you speak. It is a very unique brotherhood. ..... As for the over-the-top rabid fans, "real players" see those goobers as clowns.
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9/25/2012 9:40:58 AM

BruceInHickory
Bob: Thanks for the great plug for HRC. You were spot on. The folks here care what happens on the Hill; they (with some exceptions) just aren't consumed by it.

Looking forward to all your future columns....great perspectives.
Bruce Bumbarger

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BL: You're very welcome Bruce. I'll use my "hickory stick" as needed!
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9/25/2012 8:18:17 AM

Michael
I'm liking the Cliff Claven thing. You should keep track of the most outrageous rants and award an "ACC" (Annual Cliff Claven) to the most Clavenesque comment or rant during each football season. I don't know how long you plan to keep this up but, someday, you may even be able to present someone a lifetime "Cliffy".

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BL: The problem with your idea is that I would have to monitor the yucky places that the Cliffs hang out. I only see the ones that make it to a mainstream media site.
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9/24/2012 11:44:41 PM

oldwuf vet
"The Bob Stoops Radio Show in Norman will probably NOT take callers this week." That one got me. I have to poke the Rotarians. In our little town they are the stodgy bunch that really doesn't do anything. The weekly Kiwanis meeting is the happening place. Lots of jokes, good natured ribbing and several major community projects that all participate. A wise, much older client/friend invited me over 20 years ago. Those guys sure make the week better.

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BL: Civic clubs are like fan bases - they all have stereotype personalities!
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9/24/2012 8:41:08 PM

NCSU68Grad
Your comments on the demos for the area are what I would have thought. Being bred and born and raised in a rural section of Catawba county, the fan base is as expected. We had 48 in our graduating class....and 25 - 30 pursued higher education....of which probably 15 -20 received four year degrees. Most went to LR, WC or Happy Appy. 2 to UNC and 1 to NCSU. So, not much as changed.

As to Holden's status....lets hope it remains the same. The flash mob crowd on Friday could have just as easily been there to protest working conditions in the iPhone 5 factory (where they are rioting). Of they could have been the ones still in line for a NEW iPhone. Now the real drama starts. Will the NEW head knocker be a Larry or a Randy clone? Now THAT makes for some interesting speculation in THESE parts but 8 whatever folks in the Chinese iPhone (or supplier) factories don't REALLY give a proverbial flying fig....Glad you enjoyed your gig. Good folks up there!

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BL: Flash Mobs and candlelight vigils are "traditions like no other" in CHill... no clue yet what "the next guy/gal" might be.
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9/24/2012 1:56:36 PM

CNR
Regarding the column regarding the Choo Choo Room visit by "Bubba" and the praise of the unknown offensive line:

"No halfback with a grain of sense gets puffed up when he sees his picture in the paper and reads words of praise about himself and how wonderful he is. If he is intelligent, he knows that without the line in front of him, he'd be lucky to be alive.
". . . I've been knocked down and trampled too many times not to realize that you can't gain the length of your body unless those fellows ahead are bowling over the tacklers. When you don't get good blocking, you realize what an ordinary fellow you really are. My old lines were blocking fools and if they hadn't been, you would never have heard of this fellow.
"You take a team with an all-star set of backs and give me an all-star line."

Red" Grange (all-time all-american) 1936

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BL: The Gallopin' Ghost oughta know! .... CNR, I've been telling you that Bubba is "real good people". He GETS IT! :-)
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9/24/2012 12:08:05 PM

DrJay
Just for the record, Hickory is in Catawba County, not Cabarrus.

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BL: YIKES.... I get those C counties mixed-up. Thank goodness for the edit function.
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9/24/2012 10:51:09 AM

LG
Has Jennifer Wiley ever heard of Hickory?

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BL: As soon as we find her we'll definitely ask her. It won't be the first question however. :-)
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9/24/2012 10:40:56 AM

TedInShelby
So, BL, you're saying Bubba is NOT "a putz"?

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BL: Bubba IS NOT "a putz". The Era of The Putz AD is over..... Hip Hip Hooray !!!
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9/24/2012 10:23:56 AM

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