Men Of A Certain Age

    BobLee
    November14/ 2010

    In my opinion watching a football game is best done in front of a large high definition TV.  Going to a game however has definite social advantages.  For the second straight week I was awash in those advantages.

    The Hokies came to town.  That means Hokie Jim Alderson & The Clubhousers were holding court at The Friday Center.  Simply the quintessential finest college football fans there can be.  They score high in the key areas I judge sports fans and humans in general.

    The only thing The Clubhousers take seriously is NOT taking themselves or their Hokie Hysteria seriously.  They spend 5.5 days/week during the Fall reaping the rewards of capitalism allowing themselves 1.5 days to be very silly, enjoy each other company and extend that enjoyment to anyone wishing to join them.  I’ve known these baby booming reprobates going on 6+ years now and am very proud to be an Unofficial Hokie Clubhouser.

    The exploiting of capitalism extends to Ivan The Not Very Mad Russian Hokie who might be the great grandson of a Cossack but probably isn’t.

    They assemble en masse at every VaTech football game.  Their magnet being Clota’s Trailer.  Clota aka Senior Hokie supplies not only Clota’s trailer but a tailgate spread that is a carnivore’s delight.   Roadkill Vegan properly marinaded tastes like marinated vegan.

    Make no mistake, these guys care about Frank & Bud’s Boys and the scoreboard matters but not nearly as much as their weekly fellowship.  As noted, these fellas all make gainful contributions to society when not wearing their Hokie t-shirts, assorted silly hats, and gamboling amongst themselves over the joys of oogling long-legged gals with perky assets.

    They have two junkyard canines adding to the total number of old dogs around the trailer who chase cars but not so well as to ever actually catch one.  Invariably several long-legged gals show up.   Two did this time.  I engaged them on the inherent problems of staffing a Hooters in a town of less than 40,000.  Not surprisingly, one was a former Hooters’ gal.  Lucky guess on my part ?  Not really if you had seen her.

    A most sincere BobLee SAAAA-Lute to The Hokie Clubhousers.  Bon Chance mon amis til next year!

    ♦♦♦

    Two hours before kick-off I get a call from a UNC System poobah. “BobLee, I need two. Can you help?”  Within six minutes I had him two on the 50.  All in a Gameday’s work for an Internet Legend.

    I get to the little stone wall and Pencil is frantically yelling “BobLee BobLee; Chancellor Thorp was looking for you.”  Times being what they are with 200 years of Institutional Integrity at the mercy of Marvin’s tweets, Butch’s acute unawareness,  and Dickie’s formal letters; the words BobLee and Thorp yelled out

    …yelling THEATER in a crowded fire!

    in the same sentence was akin to yelling “THEATER” in a crowded fire.  Luckily no roving bands of board monkeys were in the immediate vicinity.

    I had an engaging conversation with Louis The Liberal Lawyer Who Makes A Mean Venison Salad.  Louis posed a great question.  How is Wisconsin a legitimate football juggernaut yet not synonymous with thugs and all the other odious crap that infects pretty much all the other college football juggernauts?

    It has to do with their entire stadium singing Brown-Eyed Girl at every game.  Maybe UNC can try that along with never recruiting anyone named Marvin ever again.

    Q:  BobLee, how many Disassociation jokes did you tell Saturday?

    A:  Way more than even the number of interceptions that T.J. threw.

    At halftime I ran into three Carolina Junction Boys From The Dooley Days – Brent, Battle & Bradley.  Those encounters are always special.  We laugh A LOT in a special code that you gotta be a Junction Boy to understand.

    Tyrod Taylor was having more time to pass on any one down than Gayle Bomar enjoyed in his entire career.  As Bill Dooley was assembling his juggernaut of the 70s, Gayle endured many afternoons of “Look Out Blocks”.

    A Look-Out Block is when the late Dennis Byrd or Ronnie Carpenter would plow over a Tar Heel offensive lineman who then turned his head to yell “Bomar – Look Out!”   You really had to be a Junction Boy to appreciate that.

    That UNC Footballer who became a real doctor is Tommy Dempsey.  Tommy, a fullback with The Carolina Junction Boys from ’65-’69, is now a for-real orthopedic surgeon in Mobile, Alabama.

    If I had stayed home with my HDTV I would have missed all that.

    ♦♦♦

    It’s mid-November but the Top Two questions in TruBlueWorld do NOT pertain to Roy’s Boyz or who might be our opponent in the Muffler Bowl THIS year.  The Top Two questions based on BobLee’s mail bag are tutor questions.  The first one I can now answer definitively.

    (1)  What is the ethnic category of The Recently Disassociated Tutor – Jennifer Wiley … and are there any pictures of her in existence?

    A:  The Tutor – Jennifer Wiley is, most definitely, of the Caucasian Persuasion.  And apparently she has never had a single picture taken in her 23 years.

    Why is her ethnicity of interest?  I shall not venture a guess, but LOTS of folks seem to want to know.  That leads to Most Asked Question #2.  One I cannot answer without risking a nasty letter from Jennifer’s attorney Joe “Smoking Gun” Cheshire.

    (2)  Just how “friendly” was Jennifer Wiley with her tutorees ?

    A:  It is 2010, with our society rapidly going to hell in a hand basket. There is intense curiosity in such prurient matters.  Dickie The Disassociater says he “could see it in their eyes” but has not defined “it”.   I have heard rumors, who hasn’t, but I don’t know.  For what its worth – like Cam Newton – “Her daddy is a preacher for heaven’s sake!”.   Moving right along.

    Q:  Why is The Pale Rider FINALLY wearing Carolina Blue on Gameday?

    A:  Because a guy with a big office in South Building told him to.

    Very Good Day for The Old Ball Coach…..
    Very Bad Day for Urban and Mack (OUCH!)

    Noon November 20 Approaches !
    BobLee’s Annual Backyard Brawl Preview midweek.
    From high atop Wuff Mountain.. RUSSELL is Coming
    BobLee

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