Lucky Day 13 of The UNC Redaction !!

    BobLee
    June05/ 2015

    On Lucky Day 13 of The Great Redaction, smoke finally emerged from the chimney over at Flagship HQ.  Signaling not a new Pope…. but a handful of (5) Level One – LOIC Charges.

    These Thirteen (13) Days of Redaction compares to:
    (1)    The 13 years it took to build the Brooklyn Bridge
    (2)    The 8 days of Apollo 11 from lift-off to splash down.Charles Lindbergh
    (3)    The 80 days it took Phineus Fogg to go “Around The World In ….”
    (4)    The 33.5 Hours it took Charles Lindbergh to fly solo across The Atlantic.
    (5)    The 36 days it took Columbus to cross “the ocean blue” from Spain to New World in 1492.
    (6)    The 72 days Kim Kardashian was married to “that NBA guy”

    Carol Folt1-thumb-225x286I have this image of Teenie Weenie Carol sitting on the floor of her “I’m THE Chancellor” Office with the 50-some pages spread out on the floor all around her.  She has a shoe box full of black magic markers.  Her teenie weenie fingers are all smudged.  She redacted 20 hours/day for THIRTEEN DAYS sustained by chicken biscuits from Time Out and mango smoothies.

    On the bright side…. those were THIRTEEN DAYS that “Chihuahua” could NOT over-react to every ridiculous “I’m Offended by _____” foolishness from the campus tremblechins.

    64fd66978bbb9822fe899694318ebf20  Skimming thru all the blah blah yadda yadda I knew the Super Sleuths deep in the bowels of William Neal Reynolds Coliseum would be dissecting each page with a razor sharp scalpel.   I did see Jan Boxill’s name an awful lot a/k/a “the most ethical person I’ve ever known” – Sylvia Hatchell.

    WHOA…. wait a minute BobLee!  That’s not Jan Boxill.  That’s Kate Beckett from Castle !!!  What’s the deal with THAT?

    So? Do you REALLY need to see another picture of “BattleAx” Boxill?  I don’t.

    I even saw Whatshisname “Bethel” name at least once.  And assorted other usual suspects who have appeared on various other suspect lists over the past five years.Gitmo

    We (“the general public”) had been forewarned umpteen times that the NOA letter would NOT (1) specify penalties or (2) order banners ripped down, or (3) hand Ol’ Roy a one-way ticket to that Super Max GrayBar Hilton “somewhere in Colorado” or to Gitmo….. But apparently “umpteen” was not enough times for some folks.

    The predictable jackass “jump-up-and-down and scream COVER UP” began about 2:00 PM Thursday and should continue well into the weekend.   My spies in West Rawlee are reporting no street riots (yet) on either Hillsborough Street or Western Blvd.  That’s encouraging I suppose.

    The possibility of all those penalties / banners ripped down / and Roy Perp Walking still might happen but we will all be about nine months to a year older than we are today before we see that.

    Now we enter the infamous 90 Days Of Formally Replying To The NOA.   That will be followed by at least two more periods of more extended waiting for reasons known only to bureaucrats who get paid by the hour…. or by the month or year…. or decade that these things drag on.

    1b05Qg.So.156That ever growing little cabal of “dirty handed perps” who all skated merrily away with their cozy pensions and bonuses (yes, YOU Dickie! …. and “Most Ethical” Jan.…. and Uncle Julius…. and Deborah) will be cashing ‘dem monthly checks from now til…. well, til they die…. and go wherever “guilty as sin” and/or “clueless” bureaucrats and cheating administrative assistants go when they die.

    It is quite possible that Brandon Ingram will have “one & doned” at Duke before any penalties are ever meted out.

    Its hard to imagine FIVE Level One Violations Including The Dreaded LOIC culminating in just a waggling finger and stern admonition “don’t do that again”.   But Ya Never Know…..

    Luckily there was no mention of “bought a recruit a pizza” (!!!) or “bought a kid a bus ticket home for his grandmother’s funeral” (!!!).   Those are the two traditional Hanging Offenses per the NCAA.   Twenty years of “an Eligibility Scheme Unmatched in NCAA History” has no precedent so maybe the NCAA poobahs will simply end up sitting on their thumbs…. spinning around in a circle and….  barking at the moon.

    The 90 Days” carries us into Color & Pageantry season.   Assuming the NCAA will need a month or so to REDACT UNC’s Formal Reply…. that probably means we’re into October before we need to assemble another Mob waiting for whatever mobs wait for.

    After five years of endless insult-trading from TruBlue bottom-feeders and ABC bottom-feeders one would think all the trite insults, name calling, excusifying and broad brush “you’re ALL a buncha ______” would be exhausted by now.    I guess we shall see if any of the goggle-eyed rabid bats in either camp can come up with something new.   I wonder how many of the really hard-core screamers on both sides of this glorious mess have the slightest clue was “redact” meantrojan-warss?

    Speaking of “a long time” ….. King Agamemnon’s Greeks kept King Priam’s Troy under siege for ten years…. or so Homer tells us.   The Great Unpleasantness is halfway there.   Don’t bet against it going a full decade.

     

     

    If you didn’t see the We Have A New Website column…. go back to the Home Page (see bar up at top) and click that Homer Simpson WOO HOO column.  It explains everything.

     

    BobLee
    • mcpack Reply
      4 years ago

      Congrats on the new website. Keep the columns coming.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        Thanks. There are A LOT of exciting things we can do with this new format to entertain readers… and “to entertain” has always been our humble objective. 🙂

    • Emmette Reply
      4 years ago

      Another great one Bob! Your description of Carol is classic. 10 more years seem easily possible. Agree with you that no way do several of these clowns deserve a pension. My suggestion would be they repay the state for years of disservice. Love the new website.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        Now Emmette, it would only require another Five years to reach a full decade. The only clown that ever deserved a pension was your namesake – Emmette Kelly! 🙂

    • NCSU68Grad Reply
      4 years ago

      OK….by your command….it is done. Was at Amedeo’s tonight. There was no black wreath on the “Dugout” (dedicated to Skippers Esposito, Tanner & Avent). T’was sure there would be

      I agree with Kennel (GASP…..did I type that). Am proud of the Baseball team….but as Jim Harrick texted Gott….”OK, State, NOW you see how we Pepperdiners felt in 1983….Tell Elliott that it WILL not go away and he will be playing that game on his deathbed”.

      This loss will take some time.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        I actually did not watch “the 8th inning”. I had been in/out earlier and saw the Pack had the big lead. Tuned in in the 9th to see the final score and saw the 2nd balk (???).
        the closest equivalent for UNCers was the Moochies first trip to Omaha when they lost the championship to Oregon State on a muffed “routine groundball to 2nd”. Such events are what WideWorldofSports meant by “the agony of defeat”.

    • bob Reply
      4 years ago

      The ink has not dried and UNC is giving ole Roy a raise and an extension. Nothing like giving the naysayers and the NCAA the finger. Crazy stuff BobLee.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        “Crazy stuff” is a relative term along quaint Franklin Street. In the Land of The Blind – The One-eyed Man is King.

        • NCSU68Grad Reply
          4 years ago

          Yes….Tricky Dicky got his contract renewed also….how’d that work out?

          • BobLee Reply
            4 years ago

            Assume you mean “Milhouse” a/k/a “I am NOT a crook”.

    • Johnny Priest Reply
      4 years ago

      It would make a nice article to get one of the blues, like John Cooper, and one of the detractors together and you be the moderator. The hilarity that would ensue would get you enough hits to last out the year.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        John Cooper ??? The name seems familiar but not sure why. …. I’ll debate or moderate anywhere, anytime. 🙂

    • 58 Wolf Kennel Reply
      4 years ago

      BL, Do like the new format and process despite getting several previous responses lost in the cloud. So I’ll make up for it here :>))
      Totally entertaining take on the NOA that you have given here. I responded to your Walter Byer death item with a story from the dim past.
      In 1957 NC State had won our first ACC Football Championship. However, we were prevented from going to a bowl gamer because of an NCAA suspension in basketball. Football Coach Earle Edwards asked me to write to the NCAA as a person who played several sports about why football should be punished for a basketball indiscretion. Walter Byers of the NCAA wrote me back a long letter which basically said that the NCAA was made up of a voluntary association of colleges and universities, not individual sports, such that penalties had to be levied against the whole institution. Coach Edwards hung my letter and Byer’s response side by side in the Reynolds Coliseum football office for at least ten years that I’m aware of.
      The baseball loss to TCU is another story. Tough, tough, tough loss. I couldn’t get it on TV in California so had to watch Pack Pride blow by blow comments from monkey board posters who were neither fans nor supporters. But here’s another way to look at it. As bad as we feel over the loss, but for any single error, passed ball, balk call, or third strike call that would have ended the game, think what TCU would have felt like losing that game with their giving up the 4 runs in the top of the 8th inning and given that they had their best pitchers available from the top staff in the country, were ranked top 5 in the country, were playing at home, and were going to host a super-regional (I almost went to TCU for ministry).
      I’m just very proud of this particular NC State baseball team. They overcame a lot and finished very strong beating 10 teams who were in the Regional and beating 4 of the 8 Super Regional hosts on away or neutral fields (Louisville, Virginia, Miami, TCU)
      Interesting to note Carlos Rodan’s positive comments after the game (he was there for the whole game). Great job he is doing with the White Sox as well including last night.
      No responses yet to my North Carolina “Conscience” duo for telling UNC-CH what they should do with the NOA :>))

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        When your comment came in on my phone, I was with your fraternity brother “LarryR”. We were with other crazy right-wing guys meeting Scott Walker. Gov Walker sends you his regards. Larry is still grieving about “the 8th inning”. Hellfire BK, even some in Chapel Hill said it was painful to watch that meltdown. A character-building opportunity for Coach Avent for sure.
        Glad you like the new site. Still working out kinks and bugs but a LOT we can do with it down the road. Certainly hope you will continue as one of BLSays Primo “Characters”.

    • TarSpartan Reply
      4 years ago

      You made up that second paragraph. I can’t believe Chancellor Folt would ever eat anything from “Time-Out.” 😉 Seriously, things aren’t looking good for the ol’ alma mater here. Objectively (i.e. an opinion from someone living out-of-state), I’m thinking SMU-level punishment may result.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        The visual of itty bitty Carol trying to manage a bil ol’ Time Out chicken biscuit IS a hoot. 🙂 ….. Nothing near an SMU level but I’m thinking a coupla years post-season ban and maybe some recruiting limits.

    • SueD Reply
      4 years ago

      It only took Columbus 36 days to cross the Atlantic? I would have guessed 3-4 months.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        That surprised me too. It would have been even faster if Christopher had flown with Charles Lindbergh.

    • fayettewuf Reply
      4 years ago

      Nice upgrade of the site. Yeah, I think the A in NOA stands for allegations. I think the next step is the bobbing and weaving, the smoke and the mirrors, heartfelt apologies, a reiteration of the 70 reforms put in place to make sure it never ever happens again in spite of the fact that everyone does it. Then the penalties that will make no one happy will be handed down.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        They could surprise us. We have three months to think about it. What p*sses me off the most are the perps with the pensions!

        That REALLY chaps me.

        • fayettewuf Reply
          4 years ago

          The pensions for the perps is aggravating. It is like the golden parachutes for CEO’s that run companies into the ground. Or maybe it is more like hush money. I am sure somehow we are all chipping in.

          • BobLee Reply
            4 years ago

            They are all North Carolina State Employees so yep, they are “on the payroll” in that sense.It did NOT HAVE to be that way. UNCCH CHOOSE to “reward them” – I’m calling them The Pensioned Perps.

    • NCSU68Grad Reply
      4 years ago

      Gee, BL, your web guy or maybe the Google Chrome Dome done filled in my “info”.

      Was at Rex Wellness toning up the abs and such as a precursor to tomorrow’s big event….celebrating a birthday that is divisible by both 7 and 10. Yegads….that means that I will double my aches and pains next year.

      CNN was running the “Millions of Federal Employee’s Personnel Records Hacked”. Supposedly the young and aspiring and hard working and hard studying Chinese lads and lassies did that. There was NO mention of UNC or TGU. Same on the Fox channel…I think they were focused on ISIS….as was CNN later on.

      YAWN is about the best way to describe my reaction. Will check out Amedeo’s tomorrow evening and see if they are plotting subversive attacks on the NCAA’s servers from the Jimmy V booth. Certainly will avoid the Elliott Avent booth. OUCH….DOUBLE OUCH. Even Mike Fox said….Glad that t’wern’t us…

      Trying to visualize an NCAA PooHBah with his thumbs implanted in areas where polite people do not put them….then spinning on their apendages like a Break Dancer and whilst howling (as in a Wuffie) at the moon. THAT would be a great YouTube piece….especially is you could get Dickie Do to assist them.

      Have fun….and YES, I do know what Redaction means….I had many presentations where my humor and political satire was redacted from the formal proceedings and our company jackals (er, lawyers) would confiscate my slides and my audio/visuals (song parodies that Rush would swoon for). I also got some stern warnings….but usually my audience was laughing their rears off… I have been redacted with the best of them.

      Good night….like the new format….

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        That 8th inning vs TCU was an item of discussion in Chapel Hill at noon today. OUCH is right! …. Go for the Lasagna. 🙂

    • Yogi Reply
      4 years ago

      Snazzy upgrade to your web site. But then I liked the way the other one looked. Call me old fashioned that way.

      Five big ones, and counting the pages to outline #1 took at least 35 of those 59 pages or so it seemed. THAT is a lot of outlining. The thing that gets to me is EVERYONE at the top of the heap (or the dumpster fires if you prefer that) rode off into the sunset drawing probably higher pension checks from THE STATE than I make, and I make pretty good money. There is something REALLY amiss with that. REALLY AMISS. And Ya know nothing is going to correct that. Somewhere, someone should have said “wanna keep getting that check every month? COME CLEAN.”

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        Alas, those pensions are a State Employees issue and not a UNC-CH one. There was some alternatives to how Julius and Jan were dealt with but in the end UNC was afraid of extended law suits.

        • Doug Reply
          4 years ago

          Surely there are plenty of angles for series upon series of legitimate and frivolous lawsuits against Jan, Julius,Deb etc. to help relieve them of their ill gotten gains. Even if they win, the legal fees alone would consume $$$ and would give them something to do in the retirement years. I’m all for something to keep them worriated and twitapated.

          • BobLee Reply
            4 years ago

            Academia does not believe in punitive actions against “it’s own kind”. Just all the rest of us. Do NOT ever leave “Dickie” out of that list of “pension perps”.

            • Doug
              4 years ago

              I can dream. Maybe Joe Taxpayer will step in where academia won’t go. This could be one of those rare times when the lunatic fringe could serve a useful purpose. How could I have forgotten Little Dickie? I am embarrassed and eternally sorry.

            • BobLee
              4 years ago

              NEVER FORGET that totally 100% unrepentant little weasel. Thank Jim Hunt for creating iron-clad protection for retired state employees.

    • Frank Linstreet Reply
      4 years ago

      Kate Beckett for Jan Boxill !!! I make THAT trade every time. That one is better than Lou Brock for Ernie Broglio.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        But how does it compare to Harvey Kuenn for Rocky Colavito? …. I had a tough choice between Beckett – JLo – or Danica Patrick.

    • 58 wolf kennel Reply
      4 years ago

      BL
      Can’t find where any of our intelligent responses are listed :+))

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        As noted in the Introductory WooHoo column…. the Oompah Loompahs are still working on transferring those over. The “intelligent ones” WILL be available in a week or so. You are welcome to add a new one.

    • Doug Reply
      4 years ago

      Bus tickets and free pizza. The good ole days. Somewhere Rick Majerus is smiling.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        Bus tickets and Pizza ….. everything else is just “cost of playing poker”.

        • Cliff Reply
          4 years ago

          So BobLee how do we get us a good SEC football lawyer to get us out of this mess? Need to go with someone who has experience in these matters. Do we get anywhere claiming that the NOAs are racist?

          • BobLee Reply
            4 years ago

            I’m sure the BlueZoneBoys will get the best legal eagles $$$$ can buy to try and preserve their precious Bragging Rights. Methinks that ship has sunk!

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