BLS: ..It Woulda Been: 140 to 28 !!

    Tiki Girls
    BobLee
    November29/ 2015

    Admit it.  You were doing the math.   EVERYBODY was “doing the math”.   If yesterday’s  annual edition of The Greatest FB Rivalry Within 100 Miles had maintained its first quarter scoring pace for four quarters it would have been:

    UNC – 140 …. NC State – 28.   

    If it had kept up that pace for just two quarters, it would have been 70 – 14 at the Half….. which totals 84…. which is about how many State fans would have come back into The Carter After The Half.   Kennel, NCGrad68, Cowdog, BOG Guy and maybe 80 others.   Cowdog being “maybe”.  Each one of’em could have had his/her own charging station.  Start counting the “charging station” jokes.  That’s One.

    It didn’t, of course.  It became a VERY competitive game after those first 15 minutes – an actual Donnybrook (with no “e”).  So competitive, in fact, that delirious TruBlues in the far corners of The Carter had to be wondering if “That Damn Dan” and “Mary & Jay” were in league with Bissett The Beast to snatch Certain Victory away from The Larry/Genes.   Despite Swoffy’s refs best efforts, “those damn farmboys from Moo U” refused to quit.Tiki Girls

    NOTE:  Yes…. those two skanky gals up top are the Infamous Tiki Girls…. bless their hearts.

    Mo Mentum switched sides at the half – Ol’ Mo DEFINITELY caused Hollins to drop that Sure Six which woulda been a backbreaker for the Coming Back ‘Pack.   With 10:00 or so to go…. alls it woulda taken woulda been (1) three perfectly executed on-side kicks PLUS (2) Frank Weedon being reincarnated as The Referee and The Greatest Comeback In The History of The Greatest FB Rivalry Within 100 Miles would have been complete.

    You will recall…. in my pre-game analysis, alls I asked for was CHAOS.  The only stat that matters in these Life Defining Encounters is not who wins or loses but was there enough pure undiluted CHAOS to make it memorable.   This one had it.

    I knew my wish had come true (1) when that first Tar Heel TD was ruled a catch. …. then (2) when Swoff’s zebras made that call on the out-of-bounds hit or whatever…. I knew 52,000 Wuff partisans’ heads were exploding.   Robert Duvall  in Apocalypse Now  can have his “smell of napalm in the morning”.   I do love the sound of overly caffeinated sports fans’ heads exploding. 

    I don’t care which fans.  It doesn’t matter so long as they are convinced that:

    The GDMF “refs” are “on the take” and “out to screw us” because _____…..

    In an ideal situation both sets of overly caffeinated paranoiacs are equally demented and every head in the stadium / arena is spinning and exploding.

    Early in the 2nd quarter as Larry was considering sending his punter back to Chapel Hill since he wasn’t going to need him evenCarterPressBox once…. I get an e-mail from one of my spec ops commandos inside The Carter-Finley Press Box.   He was in a section of the Press Box with the technical guys that operate the scoreboard, Jumbo, photogs, etc etc etc…..

    “BL, you oughta be here.  These people are going ape-**** screaming at the refs on every play.   Its just like you predicted…..” ….  “just like (I) predicted” – if I only had a nickel for every time I hear THAT.

    My quick reply to him – paraphrased Sheriff Brody from Amity onboard The Orca –

    “…..Need more charging stations…. LOTS more charging stations.”  That’s TWO.

    When I watch a game that I know, by cyber law, I HAVE to comment on; I compose possible headines and zingers as the game unfolds.   Early on, I was working on variations of General Custer’s order to his troops to “Take no prisoners” with Coach Dave being Custer….. my back-up had DD as captain of the Titanic ordering “Damn Those Icebergs – Full Speed Ahead”.

    Certainly those were discarded as Jacoby put The Men of Doeren on his back and did a yeoman’s job of trying to dig out of that 1st Quarter “Marianas Trench” of a hole.  Another quarter or two and who knows how it mighta ended.

    Oh…. KUDOS to both programs for traditional old school uniforms.  I am NOT the only one who notices.

    Believe it or not, for me, zingers about State fans and Referees / Swofford Conspiracy are passé.   They are too easy.   They’ve all been done to death.  It’s like “blacks and watermelon” or “Jews with big noses” or “Pakistanis and convenience stores”.   Every contestant at an open-mic night at a comedy club includes a “State fan / referee” joke.   In the past five years, it’s been the same with “Carolina / Swahili” of course.

    Was there a signature moment in this one to join Dudley Bradley & Clyde The Glide or TA’s Knee in the “State gets screwed by the refs AGAIN” all-time hall of fame.   I don’t think so.

    That block-in-the-back on the goal line that costs the Wuffs four points had potential but there are probably a handful of State fans on the planet that will admit the replay confirmed that one.   A “handful” is all it takes.

    You all know my personal favorite…. Kennel’s claim that there were 26 guys blocking for Gio’s punt return and everyone of’em clipped a Wuff on that play.   He says he “has the tape to prove it”.   Nothing yesterday rose to that level.

    I was glad it wasn’t the ROUT it started out to be.   The two programs should remain close in competitive strength.   This continues to be a Lightning In A Bottle Season for The Fedorians with “beating The Dabos” NOT out-of-the-question, by any means.

    I don’t get deep into the weeds analyzing team personnel strengths and needs.  If the two programs played next week or two outta three who would prevail?   Pick’em.

    The Sleeping Giant amid the pines has NOT awakened….. simply rolled over and opened one eye.

    Will “this special season” solve UNC’s “aluminum issue”?  Oh, Heaven’s No.  It might sell a few 1,000 season tics but that’s all.  The “aluminum issue” ain’t ever going away.

    Is Larry a goner for sure?  I don’t think so.  Larry Fedora

    VPI has gone with the Fuentes – The Memphis guy….. and Les gets another year at LSU.   I don’t see another gig out there right now all that attractive to Larry.   I see him rolling the dice that he can replace Gene The Wonder Coordinator and that the NCAA Hammer will not knee-cap his program.

    Oops… Mark Richt just got zapped at UGa.  That plus resulting dominos could upset some applecarts.  And Rutgers just fired their idiot HFB and bigger idiot  AD, but its Rutgers…. who cares? Ooops… Mike London just resigned at UVa… both Virginia ACC schools now “in play”. ….. Regardless….

     

    Look for Bubba to jack Larry up to about $3.2M any day now with a 2-3 year contract extension and maybe another “mill” spread among his staff.

    And don’t forget the fancy IPF w/ the Smoothie Machine.   Look for the good-faith bulldozers to start construction on that any day now.

    How VITAL is a fancy IPF?  The program WITHOUT one won this year.  I’m just sayin’.   As long as Swofford is ACC Commish does UNC really need a fancy IPF? ….. I’m sorry.  I couldn’t resist.

    Where’s all that $$$$ coming from to keep Larry?   Who the hell knows?   The usual “mysterious special fund” that does NOT affect big plans to add “more charging stations” (that’s THREE) to UNC’s Vaunted Black Cultural Center.   Do semi-literate 17 y/os care about a vaunted BCC?

    Speaking of “UNC’s Black ….” I am declaring the Angry Little Urkels’ (ALUs) 50 Demands Or Else to be an Official Fizzle.   The steve-urkel-costume-1ALUs screwed up by not having at least one black jock at their “…..Or Else” Hoot & Holler show.   Whoever in Obama’s Cartel is coordinating these college take-overs by angry black anarchists needs to realize that without high-profile black jocks all they got is a handful of Urkels.   No one other than maybe Carol Folt (from Dartmouth) is afraid of Angry Little Urkels.

    With due respect to our local Greatest Rivalry’s Scoreboard Buster…. the Game Of The Day (Night) took place in Palo Alto.   Stanford with…. (1) a tree as a mascot….. (2) a black coach…. and (3) a white running back and white WRs too !!!….. hung on to beat Notre Dame with a Hobbit place-kicker nailing a 40+er at the buzzer.    It was quite Humdingery.

    So…. assuming there was no post-game logo-stomping or locker room desecrating to add fuel to the rivalry; we can all get back to the usual 24/7 UNCheats….. Swahili…. Duke is Our Real Rival ….. Chansky will say …. Damn Dan Kane and Mary and Dr Debbie ….. blah blah blah yadda yadda.

    ###

    Oops… just learned that one of Larry’s youngsters “simply assaulted” someone last night.  Still not as bad as what happened with The Three Amigos after the TA Game….

    WHAT?  You say – “Kennel has a tape” ….. proving that block in the back on the goal line was BOGUS!   OMG !  “Zappruder Bob” strikes again…..

    ###

    Check Out a New Quirky – “Blind Gene (Nichol) Finds An Acorn”.

     

    ####

    BobLee
    • Doug Reply
      4 years ago

      You heard it here first. I’m predicting a 120-28 UNC victory against Clemson tonight. Now where is my cocktail and that vial of medication I misplaced? ??

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        You need to call the Sports Book @ Caesars Palace and put $10 on that. You could “win the lottery”!

    • Porgie Reply
      4 years ago

      I was personally offended that I was not included in the 84 fans that would remain despite the early onslaught but like the final results, I am now over it. My group of 6 remained until the bitter end and it was bitter. BK and his group also remained. Knew the Wolfpack were in trouble when the first review was ruled a catch. Then the first holding call was on a UNC-CH lineman and I told myself that there would be a make-up call later should the Wolfpack start getting close. Sure nuff, not one but 2. Johnny must have put some real heat on the striped shirts. The hit out of bounds and block in the back were both legitimate calls. My problem with the out of bounds call was that a back judge 25 yards down field threw the flag, not the 2 refs nearest the play. Those 2 were also the ones that called the one-hopper to Switzer a catch. Agree with 68 that 5-8% were wearing lt. blue, mostly buttoned down shirts anfd khaki pants as the uniform of the day. But the song of the day does go to the Wolfpack. https://www.facebook.com/whitney.bell.39/posts/959238985694 . Not good at posting links.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        I figured Mrs Porgie would get you and your duct-taped up ticker out of there if UNC hit 50. Only so much pain a bum ticker can handle. …. it is better that it was a Donnybrook instead of a Rout.

    • JD Reply
      4 years ago

      I really don’t believe Fedora wants to leave. Just print some money and give him a raise. I don’t see the Georgia job that much of an upgrade right now considering the talent Fedora has been bringing in and the competition he is facing. If he can keep a Chizik clone on staff to coach the defense (Something Fedora can’t do) I could see the Tar Heels becoming a national power.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        I don’t see LF EVER “bleeding blue” if that matters to anyone any more. The “aluminum issue” might lessen a bit but UNC will NEVER be a FB School with the fan fervor of an SEC or Big 12 school …. if that matters to Larry. My guess he would be most interested in a Texas or Okla based gig.

    • TheCowdog Reply
      4 years ago

      Because I pace the stadium, my empty seat would not have been noticed. It’s always bare!

      However, had math continued in a linear path, I indeed would have taken a seat…right next to my cooler.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        Best for all concerned, IMO, that a potential rout did evolve into a Donnybrook. TruBlue board monkeys will not agree but that only fortifies my opinion. 🙂

    • NCSU68Grad Reply
      4 years ago

      OK, BL
      I stayed the whole game and it was not the most pleasant 3:45 that I have spent.
      Officiating….I was probably one of the FEW in Red that thought the Late Hit was Legit. The guy in front of me yelled about that call for 10 minutes and then got up and left as his wife told him that she had Texted security and they were on the way. There WERE some folks REALLY upset.
      Overall, the Refs reminded me of the U v Dook crew…….I have now decided that “holding”, as in a Passing Situation, requires the use of excessive physical force, eye gouging, crotch kicking, duct tape, and Tasers. Therefore, it was not called as the UNC Linemen had to toss the Taz’s into the “Illegal Weapons” barrels when they went through security. Duct Tape was permitted. Seriously, it was not exactly one of the ACC’s Stellar performances….and that went both ways.
      Yes, it was a REAL ruction (I had to check on the real definition of Donneybrook) and happened across that term. The Hat’s Shock and Awe in Q1 had its impact…..and it was difficult to dig out of the hole. You, as an astute sports observer, know how many times a critical mistake (fumble, foul, whatever) where the ball is turned over or an opportunity MISSED, often results in a game changing NEXT Play and Williams pulled it of. OUCH…OUCH….DOUBLE OUCH…
      Now for a little speculation. Of COURSE Swoff, from the ACC War Room, was monitoring the calls and looking over the shoulders of the ACC “Final Authority” refs in G’town. So, we KNEW that most calls would be in favor of the Light Blue.
      Poor Johnny….he has a real moral and financial dilemma next week. When he does his little pre-game pep talk for the Final Authority crew….does he bias them to Light Blue….as that seems to be in his DNA OR does he wear his TRUE Power 5 ACC fedora and tell them to make sure the Orange get the benefit? Really tough call…..back to back NCAA FB Champions would be a really cool thing for him to be able to work into his presentations, triads, advertising promos, etc. I GUESS we shall see….
      At least the CF was FULL….on a T-Day weekend. The Sell Out probably hit 98% when scanned. AND there was FAR less Light Blue there compared to a game in the lofty and haloed pines. My unofficial estimate was between 5 – 8%….paid too much attention to the game to refine it. BUT, the fans that did attend and congregated in theNE corner were a boisterous and noisy lot…..they held a 20 minute pep rally after the game and the small pep band passed around O2 bottles so they could keep playing.
      There was not the Logo Stomping afterwards and everything seemed orderly, but it took 15 minutes AFTER the final whistle before the UNC Light Blue and Brass shut up so that the NCSU Alma Mater could be played. Obviously the Hat did NOT put that in his lists of “thou shalt not”. He also left out the “don’t F*&^ with Bouncers at 3:00 AM in RALEIGH….as I do NOT contribute to the RPD Benevolent Fund”. Double OUCH.
      As painful as the loss was, Coach Doeren took the blame for prep. He did not even mention the idiotic antics of the Biblical Shad and why he would STILL kick him off the team for riding a MoPed on a public sidewalk….
      I agree, the Rams Club will tap into their war chests….but will they have enough booty to keep Gene? That is the MultiMillion $$ question. LSU finally got their abacus back on line and calculated the cost of getting rid of Les (or after Jimbo said NO) and saved some bread.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        I see Chizik going to UCF which should be a perfect fit. Don’t know if the next DCoor is on-staff or outside. The economics at UNCCH are NOT conducive to a mega uptick for LF and staff but it WILL happen via one of those “secret funds” that Gene Nichol talks about. If not then LF is “outtahere”.
        .
        Back to back FB Nat Champions for ACC ??? Did you forget The Ohio State?

        • NCSU68Grad Reply
          4 years ago

          Good CATCH. With all the hoopla about Thug-A-Lete Jamius Winston, I had FSU as the top dog last year.
          That will probably influence Swoff…..but if you could send the Tiki Twins to his secret lair, they MIGHT come back with enough photos so that Clemson stood a chance.

          We shall see….what we shall see……Denver (minus a Manning….who was NOT giving advice to Osweiler) just knocked off the mighty 10 – 0 Patriots, lead by Tom Brady.

          Holy Feces on the porch….burning in a paper bag….The Carolina Panthers are the TOP DOG and the only X – 0 team left. They are 11 – 0….who woulda thunk that?

    • 58 wolf kennel Reply
      4 years ago

      Excellent column that captures all the emotions of both sides. Since I’m somewhat late to the comment game on this thread, here are just a few comments:
      Game was worth watching live.
      Death in first quarter.
      Some life breathed back if we could have just had a fifth quarter :+))
      Tar Heel fans were surprisingly quiet and polite.
      Was a block in back at goal line but never called at the line :+((
      Took beautiful picture of sunrise this morning from bedroom noting that the sun really did come up.
      Both my pastors at church went to Carolina, and they were quietly happy.
      Gene Nichols’ column in N&O this morning was witheringly on the mark.
      Finally, I would still rather be where NC State is right now from Chancellor through AD and Coaches and teams and without the NCAA Sword of Damocles hanging over our head.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        High quality comments BK as always. 🙂
        * Most UNC fans are literally scared spitless whenever they “have to go” to Carter. They recall the old F-Bomb Alley on Trinity Road.
        * “JudgeBob” Orr is going to tell Gene Nichol that I actually agreed with him… this once. Not sure how his comments went down in South Bldg !!!
        * UNCCH’s “executive management” would embarrass a 3rd world country. It is worse than outsiders imagine. “Floundering” is an apt term.
        * That “sword” could be the X factor that causes LF to vamoose. I probably would leave if I were him. Hard to imagine his “stock” ever being higher. The dominoes falling in the Georgia situation could open a dream job for LF.
        * That LF could whup Dabo in a shoot-out is not that far-fetched… but even then, UNC does NOT get in Final Four.

    • EllenK Reply
      4 years ago

      BL, I hope you don’t mind a little praise! My husband and I have been reading your website for 6-8 years. I forget how we found it. Like many, we are a Divided Household in our partisanship. The info you post – both the articles and your analysis – is unlike anything we get anywhere else. A number of our friends just read the “board monkeys” from both NCS and UNC and are almost always dead wrong in what actually happens and why. We let them rant and spew then we say “well, maybe; but BobLee says……” and they huff and puff and shut up. After all these years, they are finally learning to trust us…. because we TRUST BOBLEE. 🙂

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        YIKES! and WOW!… and Thank You. Other than being naturally incredibly insightful (!!); I can only attribute my quite high “BL is Right” % to becoming impartial. I’m not burdened by life-long hard-wired hatred of where someone else went to college. I’ve met plenty of stone-cold morons from every fan base. 🙂
        .
        I do appreciate you and your husband’s loyalty and trust. I will try to keep earning both.:-)

    • DW Reply
      4 years ago

      Bob,
      I found this old picture of Amy tucked away. Any idea if she is still in the Raleigh area?
      DW

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        Is one of the Tikis an “Amy”? Seems like one was “Lori” but its been awhile. There was also a WRBZ “Buzz Babe” named Amy about the same time. I recall Buzz Babe Amy “dated a State guy”
        .
        Your pic is THE JIGGLY ONE (Gene Galen’s) that made the Tikis such a Triangle sensation back in 2002. I hope my mentioning them will ferret out current info about them or at least a few salacious rumors.
        .
        I doubt they joined a nunnery but ya never know. 🙂

        • Doug Reply
          4 years ago

          That Tiki gal in red has what them good ole boys call a high speed rear end now dontchaknow!!

          • BobLee Reply
            4 years ago

            Observant of you to notice. Another reader just supplied some background that both “Amber and Lori” worked as Hooters Girls on Old Wake Forest Rd after their fame as The Tikis.

    • fayettewuf Reply
      4 years ago

      Woke up this morning, beautiful day at the beach, self esteem intact, sun still shining, same amount of capital assets, no change in the attractiveness of female friends; pretty much how it would have been if my alma mater’s football team had managed an upset. I watched the first quarter and realized that the Pack could not stop UNCCH’s offense and that offense would not outscore them and resigned myself that the outcome would not be as I had hoped. I did the math too and realized that it could be a real embarrassment to Coach Doeren. I do not believe in moral victories, Swofford’s pregame instructions to refs nor suspicion that coaches somehow forget to tell the players to play hard. The Pack did regroup to keep the game from being what baseball players used to call a laugher.
      As for Fedora using this season as a tunnel to facilitate his escape, I would not be so sure. I don’t know what the thinking in heads out of the sand is about how tied up his hands will be after the NCAA decides how hard to come down. Looks like his ‘risky’ hire in the face of the unpleasantness might have paid off. Didn’t you have a ‘he hired who’ column?

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        LF was 100% a Bubba Hire. “Call me Dickie” had been banished from the UNCAthDept in Oct when Bubba arrived. Bubba hired LF in early Dec to replace “Interim Ev” Withers. With the most recent firings – UGA, UVA (and Rutgers but who cares) there MAY be less of a chance LF will stay despite “mo $$$” and all the usual perk crap. UNC is still the same school Mack left for all the same reasons Mack left. Despite all the so-called EXPERTS… NO ONE knows where / how the NCAA Hammer will fall.
        .
        Glad to hear you survive the experience yesterday. I suspect a few really hard-cores did not.

    • wolfdon Reply
      4 years ago

      Charging station? Hell, all along i thought you were saying Changing Station……..i had to go to mine before the 1st Qtr. was over………

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        DD has identified “more CHARGING stations” in the locker room as essential to NCSU becoming a Juggernaut Program. Who knew??? ?

    • Don Reply
      4 years ago

      Donnybrook has no “e” in it.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        My copy editor went to church so I winged it.

    • Frank Linstreet Reply
      4 years ago

      Tell us again…. who are The Tiki Girls ?? …. HUBBA HUBBA!

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        Gladly young grasshopper. The “TGs” go back to 2002. A game photog – Gene Galen – snapped a shot at “a State/Carolina game at Carter” of two girls in the stands in tight t-shirts (one wearing C-Blue, the other S-Red). This was early days of photo software but he rigged it so they “jiggled”. The pic went MEGA-VIRAL.
        .
        Turns out, as I recall, they were local Raleigh high school gals. One of’ems Dad went ballistic that his daughter was being exploited and threatened “to sue the Internet” or some such. The teen-skanks loved their celebrity and posted additional pics (this one survives 14 years later on google). One of’em ended up “dating” (??) Rashad McCants. The mind reels! She preceded Khloe Kardashian as a Rashad Conquest. No idea what Daddy thought about THAT.
        .
        I was always an “Amy The Buzz Babe” fan myself, but The Tikis became legendary in their own way. No clue what ever happened to the Tikis… or to Amy for that matter. Hope this helps. 🙂

    • Doug Reply
      4 years ago

      Tar Heels will gladly concede to NCSU the all important moral victory for the final score being “reasonably” decent. The best blue collar team won Saturday. The pressure rests with Clemson and Swofford now. If the Heels somehow unexpectedly, miraculously, prevail over the Tigers, Swofford may need a full sphincterotomy to recover from the ACC being left out of the January proceedings. I was hoping the Gamecocks would do it for him yesterday but next Saturday will do. Early call. UNC will score but Clemson can and will outscore UNC. Hope I’m wrong.

      • BobLee Reply
        4 years ago

        I’m pretty sure there will be ZERO “UNC System Loyalty” for flat-screen fans in the Dabo vs Larry game. Won’t nary a Wuff be pullin’ for their system sister.

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